


Comes With The Territory

by kuonji



Category: Starsky & Hutch
Genre: Animals, Crack, Friendship, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-26
Updated: 2012-03-26
Packaged: 2017-11-02 13:52:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/369698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kuonji/pseuds/kuonji
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>Suddenly, a hoarse, strobing cry rang out, and a red and white form blurred past, directly in his line of strike. </em>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Comes With The Territory

**Author's Note:**

> This story was nominated for a [Torino Award](http://bcl.skeeter63.org/2009awards.shtml) in 2009, category "Alternate Universe".
> 
> This story was nominated for an [Ollie Award](http://community.livejournal.com/sh911award_com) in 2010, category "Big Eyes Award (Best crack story)".
> 
> Alternative Links:  
> <http://starskyhutch911.livejournal.com/185590.html>

He wheeled around again, sharp eyes focused on where he thought his prey would break cover. There was not a rustle from down below, but he knew. He could pick out the tell-tale flickers of color from between the tree leaves from two miles away. A slight disturbance, and suddenly the air below was alive with gray and white and flutters of iridescence.

He picked his target. There.

In perfect, deadly silence, he tumbled over, tucked his wings tight, and dove.

The membrane over his eyes automatically came up to protect him as he never took his gaze away from his prey -- a young pigeon, quick but still clumsy. He rolled slightly, making sure he was staying on target. The wind sheared past him at close to 200 miles per hour. He tensed and half-mantled his wings, ready to extend his fisted talons for the killing blow.

Suddenly, a hoarse, strobing cry rang out, and a red and white form blurred past, directly in his line of strike. Panicked, he spread his wings fully and veered away. Beating his wings hard in the still air, he craned his flexible neck around quickly for this reckless threat. He opened his razor-sharp beak and screeched a piercing challenge cry of his own.

The answer came -- that same _bee-eee-eee!_ that grated on his sensitive ears.

A quarter of a mile towards the direction of the setting sun, he spotted him. It was a bird about a third larger than himself, with wide wings and a garishly red tail fringed with white that he instantly disliked.

A quick glance downwards told him that the pigeons he'd been counting on for his dinner had gone to roost. With two birds of prey overhead, none of them was likely to come out of hiding again for the night.

Filled with fresh fury, he bobbed his head once and screamed a warning at the impudent trespasser.

The other bird called back a taunting shout of fearlessness.

They circled a little closer together, the light shifting with their direction, falling now in his eyes, now in the other's. He studied his opponent, noting the sleek feathers, the powerful talons, and the healthy glow to his golden eyes. Weight and lift were on the stranger's side, but he had better maneuverability, he thought.

The circle tightened slowly. They were now only ten yards apart.

The other bird flared his wings briefly, dipping then rising again. _Come get me_ , he seemed to say.

But he wouldn't be conned that easily. He gaped his beak open and showed off the black markings around his head: _I'm ready for you._

His opponent was as impatient as he'd thought. When they were five yards apart, the red-tailed bird flapped up, then dove at him. He was ready. He flipped over in a split-second and thrust up with his talons to rake at the stranger's underside.

That elicited a startled half-scream, and the other bird narrowly avoided injury by throwing himself to the side. The downdraft from the red-tail's wings derailed his own flight path so that he had to scramble to right himself again.

They drew apart, each with new respect for the other.

Usually, just a display of strength was enough, but had that been enough? He stroked upwards, gaining height on his adversary and making his ownership of this territory clear.

The other bird did not follow him up. But neither did he leave. Angry and irritated now, he dove at the other bird, talons outstretched. His target dodged at the last second, then twisted back just in time to buffet him over the head with his larger wings, but he did not extend either talons or beak.

He looped around and stared in confusion.

Was he... Was he _playing_ with him? He swooped in a tight circle and dove again. Again, the other bird dodged away without trying to fight back. He cocked his red-brown, speckled head as if to say, _Well?_

A movement below caught both their attentions. He dismissed it quickly -- a squirrel bounding across the ground from the safety of one tree to another.

His companion, however, folded instantly into a stoop.

He swooped in a lazy circle, watching with professional interest as the other bird hurtled toward his object. At the last possible instant, he extended his talons and struck the entirely surprised squirrel straight on. The crushing grip coupled with the stunning blow subdued the prey within a matter of seconds.

It was a clean kill. Bloodier than his own method, but very effective.

The red-tail was already halfway back, carrying his prize. He reached down and ripped off pieces, eating on the wing. Disgusting.

Instead of finishing off the squirrel, the other bird fluttered close and, in a shocking move, swung his legs forward and tossed the remains of his meal towards him.

Screeching in protest, he dodged away from the furry mess. He clacked his beak and half-closed his eyes, berating the fool.

The squirrel was snapped up, and the red-tail came around again. He glared in warning, but the squirrel was hurled at him a second time. Again, he dodged away and scolded the red-tailed clown.

Unchastened, the stupid bird repeated his maneuver a third time. Then, incredibly, a fourth.

His rumbling stomach reminded him that he hadn't had anything to eat today. Grudgingly, the fifth time his feathers were nearly soiled by dead mammal meat, he snatched the peace offering out of the air with his talons.

He normally only dined on birds, well-plucked, of course. But he supposed a bit of furred flesh wouldn't kill him.

 _He_ would eat properly, however.

He spotted a sturdy tree limb, covered but high enough for good surveillance, and he wheeled down towards it. He noticed the other bird following him, but he didn't break away. When he landed, and the other landed right next to him, he only mantled his wings and hissed half-heartedly, letting the trespasser know to keep his distance.

He plucked the fur out fastidiously before eating the meat. It was surprisingly tasty. The red-tail watched him avidly, seeming to show happy satisfaction whenever he was careless enough to evince some sign of liking the food.

As he polished off the remains, he reflected that their diets were quite dissimilar. There was enough prey for the both of them. He supposed they could share.

When the hawk fluffed up his feathers and settled down brazenly to sleep in _his_ roost, he only watched in resignation. Then, finally, he sidled closer to share the body heat.

There would be time enough tomorrow to sort out their territory lines.

  
END.   
  


**Author's Note:**

> I originally wanted Starsky to be a peregrine falcon, because, given the choice, wouldn't Starsky want to be the fastest animal on Earth?  In the end, however, I couldn't resist giving him Torino colors as a red-tail hawk.  In retrospect, I think the cool deadly beauty of the peregrine suits Hutch. ;)  
>  
> 
> * * *
> 
> If you enjoyed this story, you might try these:  
>      [...But Three Lefts Do](http://community.livejournal.com/starskyhutch911/147906.html) (Starsky & Hutch), by kuonji  
>      [A Different Sort Of Command](http://kuonji14.livejournal.com/13917.html) (Stargate SG-1), by kuonji  
>      [It Was A Dark And Stormy Night](http://www.starskyhutcharchive.com/starskyhutchgen/classics/cattales2.html) (Starsky & Hutch), by Suzan Lovett   
>  


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